I received a call from my then 13 yr old daughter crying, saying her chest hurt. I rushed over to pick her up from daycare to take her to the doctor’s office. She greeted me angrily “I wish you wouldn’t go ahead and make an appointment after I told you I didn’t want to go to the doctor’s!”
Having turned 13, she would no longer be able to attend daycare after this summer session. She wanted to squeeze every moment of time she could with her friends and teachers, now as the summer was drawing to a close.
As I drove her, she moved her body as far away from me in the front passenger seat as she could. Her aversion to me and any contact included giving me the silent treatment.
Hey, remember me? The lady who adores you and cares about you? The one who nursed your many fevers and handled hundreds of diapers? Remember me? The one who has to do unpopular things when I know you are not yet able to discern and appreciate these decisions. The battle waging within you to grow up so fast and yet, stay a child.
The doctor gave her an inhaler to outrule asthma, and we discussed several cardiac conditions that may cause similar symptoms. She was a part of the conversation, so she must have surmised that it was a worthwhile visit. As we left the office, she reached for my hand to hold, “I love you Momma.”
And all is back to normal, my child is back.
“I love you too! Being a parent means sometimes doing the unpopular thing out of love. ”
She turned toward me and smiled, “I know.”
Copyright © 2011 Ella Venezia
All Rights Reserved
I love this post. I have a 14 year old son, who alternately hates me and loves me several times a day, week, etc. It gets exhausting, but it's comforting to know we're all in this together!
ReplyDeleteKaren-Thanks for your comment! It seems it is a universal teenager (and adolescent) reaction to us doing what we know we have to in order to protect and teach our kids. I was told from parents with kids now in their 20's and 30's, that not until their kids became adults (and in many cases, parents themselves) were they able to see that these unpopular moments were "love in action."
ReplyDeleteKaren you must be "parenting" if you get the hate...love...hate...love reaction. Press on and know that love will carry you through these moments.
Blessings and all the best to you! Ella